Bed Bound

A fortnight ago, I got a call from one of my cousins. Her sister was moving – the following day – to Wales. In the middle of clearing out her house, she had realised she had a spare bed. My cousin rang to see if I wanted it. I thought about it for a second and said, ‘Thanks but no Thanks.’ I knew I’d want another bed at some stage, but I didn’t think I needed one now.

About an hour later, I rang my cousin back.

‘Can I be a PITA and change my mind about that bed?’ I asked.

‘Of course!’ came the reply. It would be dropped around in an hour. Between the first and second phone calls, I had given the bed some thought. If I had a double bed, it could go in my eldest daughter’s room. I could move the bunk-beds from her room into my younger daughter’s room and, that way, when I had visitors, they could have my elder daughter’s room while the two girls shared the bunk beds in the room of the younger. Fantastic! I was doubly delighted because I am expecting a friend to come and stay with us in a month, for an extended period.

When the bed arrived, however, things did not quite pan out that way.  For a start, there was no mattress with it, which I had expected, to be honest. Upon inspection, it wasn’t really that great a piece of furniture at all, and it certainly wasn’t ‘nearly new’ as I had been told. In fact, I started to think that if it had gone in the skip, that would not have been so terrible a thing. Still, I figured that, seeing as I had it now, I’d buy a good mattress for it and it would do for a year or so.

Finally tackling the job of moving all the furniture around, I first tried to move the bunk beds out of my eldest daughter’s room. No joy. I’d forgotten that the bed had been assembled in the room. In order to move them out, I’d have to disassemble and re-assemble them. Well, that wasn’t going to happen.

So, I thought I’d put the double bed into my younger girl’s room. It would fit, but it would be a tight squeeze. There wouldn’t be room for much else. I realised that it wasn’t going to work. Things would have to revert to how they had been. The bunk beds where they were and the small single bed back in the room I’d just taken it out of.


Further, I’m now going to have to get a skip myself to get rid of the blasted thing. I have other bits and pieces around the house that need to be skipped, so I’m not getting it *just* for the bed. Still, I’m a bit put out because a skip bag would easily have taken care of the things I need to get rid of. So, really, it’s going to cost me €25 to get rid of a bed I never used.

I’ll stop moaning now, because I have learnt from this experience. I’ve learnt a couple of things, actually.

First of all, that if something is working, then let it keep working.

Secondly, I have learnt that I have enough stuff of my own. I don’t need other people’s.

Thirdly, people will lie – or at least stretch the truth – if it is in their own best interests to do so.

Fourthly, if I think I want something, I should make sure that the goods are ‘as described’ before accepting them.

Finally, there’s enough stuff in my house. I need to get rid of things, not take in more!